Jaws

Hello fellow gamers, today I’m going to give you my second Halloween review and it’s the most awful, most frustrating game I’ve played in my life, based on one of Steven Speilberg’s finest motion pictures, I’m talking about the terror that LJN has titled Jaws. Honestly this game is harder than Castlevania III, but that was an awesome game, this is just madness, First I will talk about the well known LJN, supposedly LJN is infamous for making a ton of crappy video games on the early Nintendo systems, they ruined childhood icons like The X-men and Spider-man, they even had the guts to ruin Major League Baseball and National League Football, they even had to make horror movie Icons like Freddy Kruegger and Jason Voorhees look like girls at a tea party. But they even had to ruin Jaws one of the most frightening movies ever made by Mr. Speilberg himself, so lets get to the game, so far the title screen is hardly creative and it has the most awful 8-bit rendition of John Williams music so far the graphics are boring, the music is superbly bad, the sound is actually okay, and the game play is the most God awful thing in this frustrating piece of poop of a game. I’ve gotten to Jaws but never destroyed him. So far you need shells to buy stupid poop which is useless anyway so what’s the point of getting them anyway, as I was saying I got to Jaws but I never have beaten him. So far this game is awful and I dare you to play it because it’s so awful, I’m serious you’ll be haunted forever if you play this amazingly poopy game. Well there’s Jaws for you, I’ll see you next time.

Castlevania I-IV

Hello fellow gamers to a special review, for I am going to review the Castlevania trilogy on the classic NES and Super Castlevania IV on the triumphant SNES. The first castlevania game is possibly one of the hardest games of all time on the NES because of its difficulty level and energizing boss battles so far it’s one of the best games on the Nintendo Entertainment System, it’s a sweet game what can you say?, So far I’ve only made it to half of the second stage What I don’t like about this game is that when Simon Belmont gets hit he jumps back which is really annoying, also the enemies I really hate are the stupid medusa heads that float up and down on the screen so far the plot of castlevania is like if you put Conan the barbarian and Horror of Dracula together, basically the character you play as (Simon Belmont) has to destroy Dracula so he can rid all evil from his country, the sound is good for an NES game and the graphics are very decent, and the music is catchy. Castlevania II Simon’s Quest is in a completely different genre other than the first one. First of all it’s a RPG which isn’t bad but why do something like that? Second there aren’t really any stages, third and fourth most, it’s annoying and cryptic, why? Well the annoying parts can be simple things like jumping on platform but this platform has what they call pitfalls which are blocks that you fall through and to tell one block from another you need to buy holy water, also there’s the classic text box that interrupts the game play in between day and night. So far those are the annoying parts of Castlevania II and here are the cryptic parts, So far I got to a dungeon with a missing platform that I can jump on so I pick the white crystal and then the platform appears, the graphics are a lot better than the first one and that can be said for the music and the sound. The plot of Castlevania II is that after Dracula was killed in the first game his body parts were scattered in different dungeons across Transylvania and you have to collect them to destroy the curse of Dracula once and for all. Castlevania III Dracula’s curse is basically a redesigned game of the first one and is considered to be the best of the trilogy because you can play as other characters such as Grant, Sypha, and Alucard who is Dracula’s son believe it or not and the strangest thing about this game is that it is a prequel to the series in which you play as Simon’s Ancestor Trevor Belmont who fought Dracula for the first time. Considering it is the best of the Castlevania trilogy they had to make it superbly difficult. Although Castlevania III is a good game it is very similar to the first one except the difficulty is much more frustrating. Super Castlevania IV in my opinion is the best of the four games not that I don’t like the NES trilogy it’s just because the graphics and audio is amazing and its great to play a castlevania game similar to the original but just a graphical enhancement. Well there’s Castlevania I, II, III, and IV for you next time I promise I will review a bad game but it is that time of year again, no offense.

Godzilla 2: War of the Monsters

Hello yet again Fellow readers I forgot to mention in my Godzilla monster of monsters review that there was a sequel known as Godzilla 2 War of the monsters, to me I thought this game was going to be beast, because the first one was boring, so here we go with Godzilla 2, so far the graphics are okay, but the setting is so stupid, it looks like Risk, and you don’t even play as the monsters, you’re the stupid military, that’s a good idea why don’t you make the third one a Godzilla jigsaw puzzle, if they even made a third one, because its so boring. The music is so annoying they have on the menu an option to turn it off thank God, and the sound effects again are just choppy explosions.

Godzilla: Monster of Monsters

Hello Again fellow readers, Here’s another edition of bonus review(s), today I am going to talk about a bad Godzilla game for the original Nintendo Entertainment System, First I’m Going to Review Godzilla Monster of monsters, So far the title screen is cheap because Godzilla’s covering half of the title, the graphics are okay for an NES game but the first screen of the game is like a chess board and you can only play as Godzilla (of course) and Mothra, when you move your character you go into these battle fields, Godzilla looks okay, your first bosses are Moguera and Gezora from Space Amoeba, and The Mysterians, the sound effects are just choppy explosions.

Batman Games

Today I’m going to review a bunch of games based on one of my favorite super heroes of all time the dark knight himself Batman.

First I’m going to talk about the NES game by Sunsoft in 1989; so far you get three different weapons first you get the bat-a-rang which can instantly come back but you still loose ammunition when you use it, second you get the gun that shoots rockets which is cool, and third you get three way fire ninja stars which can take out enemies in two hits. You also get a Ninja Gaiden style wall jump which is awesome. The bo0ss battles are lengthy but it all pays off if you beat the Joker at the end, so far its really hard and really fun like most Sunsoft games like Blaster Master, Festers Quest, and Gremlins 2, also there was a Game boy port which was nothing like the NES game.

Batman looks like a midget and he shoots exploding super balls, so far I’ve got up to Jack Napier you have to shoot him in the head in order to beat him but the thing is he can shoot in any direction and can kill you in just four shots of gun fire, but you can only shoot forward and you jump like your in an anti-gravity zone, its so annoying you’re always going to die and so far as I know there are no game genie codes and you just have to get lucky. Overall it’s a good game.

Next came the game I like in particular based on the sequel known as Batman Returns the super Nintendo version is like turtles in time and also being that it was mad by Konami at the time it’s a great game. The Sega genesis version was stupid that’s all I’m going to say. The NES version was laughable. There was supposedly to be a version for Game boy but it was made in 1991 even though the film didn’t come out until a year later. From what I heard Nintendo was impatient because Warner bros. were taking there sweet time with the sequel so Nintendo made up there own sequel known as Batman: Return of the Joker. What followed was one of the most mediocre sequels to a decent game you only get a grappling hook and bat-a-rang besides the game is okay. Then there was the most confusing and mind numbing sequels to follow batman forever for the Sega game gear so far you only beat up two guys and then nothing.